Alton Towers

We went to Alton Towers on Wednesday. Whilst Daddy went on all the boring rides like Oblivion and Nemesis, I went on the interesting rides, like Old MacDonalds Tractor. I mean, what is the point of rushing up and down and sideways and upsidedown so fast that you can't see the view much better to see the scenic side of life from a Tractor, I think!

I even got to drive my Tractor (no handed, as you see) - Daddy had to go where his ride took him.

Good reception.

Not so much a bad hair day, as a weird hair day. I think Mummy thinks I'm a doll, or something! Oh well - if it keeps her out of my hair the rest of the time... ! At least I can recieve Digital TV now! 

So what time is it?

Time for a Story!

I love people reading me stories. Today, when Daddy got home from work I said "book", and being the obedient servant that he is, he straightway got me a book from the shelf, whilst I went and waited for him by our chair-where-we-read-books. Then I cuddled up to him, and we read "My World Picture Book"! 

My ball pool

I went out in my ball pool the other day. It's quite different to my paddling pool: it's colourful and lumpy rather than wet. My hat might look pretty (or Cute!, if you insist), but it gets in the way a bit, so I took it off.
Daddy told me that unless I put my hat back on, I would have to go inside. I did try:

Happy Birthday Granny

The Tick-Tock is tick-tocking for Granny. It's her birthday today you see. She's not quite one hundered-and-onety-one, but she is over half way there. This is the present that I gave her: a place-mat covered with my likenesses. It's to encourage her with her eating, you know!

Ideal Home?

Do you think the Ideal Home magazine would run a story on me? My home is ideal for me. Surely this picture would make the magazine: I could tell them about them about my latest project to tile the lounge floor with alphabet flash cards. 

What's going on here?

Don't tell Daddy about this one: I'm not sure he would like me disco dancing! 

Recursion!

You are now looking at a picture of me looking at pictures of me! 

An ethical dilema

Until Sunday afternoon, White chocolate Malteasers were my favourite sweet in the whole wide world.

Not any more.

You see, Granny had put five of the milky white crunchy sweets in a bowl, and handed them to me. What a treat! And so I munched happily away for three mouthfulls. Then it happened.

"Can I have one, please?", said Mummy.

What am I to do? Hand already on its way to mouth with the fourth Malteaser - too late for Mummy to have that one. And so I looked at the fifth. There in my other hand, the chocolate begining to melt, promising to dissolve as deliciously on my tongue, and the crunch as crispily between my teath, as the rest.

But Mummy wants it. She said so. And Mummy is very good to me. She always makes sure that I start my tea before she starts hers. She breaks off bits of her cookie for me, she bakes me bananna bread.

But she eats more than me anyway. She doesn't need one of my Malteasers. Granny gave them to me. Why should I give one to Mummy?

But she's my Mummy. I love her. She gives me my milk every morning, and every evening before I go to sleep. Perhaps she needs White Malteasers to make my Milk?

Oh, what should I do?

It was too much for me. I burst into tears.

And then I squashed the Malteaser in my fist and threw it on the floor.

A record breaker?

So a four year old is going to get the record for Lands End-to-John O'Groats is he? My trusty new steed and I will see about that! 

Visiting India in Leicester

We went to India today - India in Leicester that is. Aunty Jay lives there, and we went to visit. Mummy bought me a nice new suit. Smart, isn't it?

Door of opportunity

To what new world does this door lead? 

Aunty Aileen

My Aunty Aileen (That's Ay-leen, not Ay-lee-en as my Daddy sometimes calls her- she's not at all green, and she drives something more firmly attached to the ground than a UFO) came over from Canada to see me. I think she was seeing other people as well, and doing some kind of tour thingy in Europe, but I was obviously the main attraction.

She's a librarian. Does this picture give it away? 

The Monster

In a nice, nice village, there is a nice, nice street. And in that nice, nice street, there is a nice, nice house. And in that nice, nice house there is a strange, strange room. And in that strange, strange room, there lives a MONSTER.

Grey and yellow, it lurks in the corner, sleeping most of the day through, until at evening it emerges. Dragged by my brave Mummy, it is taken to the bottom of my high chair. From my cotroom I hear it roar as it greedily eats up the crumbs which have fallen from my table.

I wonder about it sometimes, as I play in the other room: what does it do as it lies there. Of what does it dream? Of carpets covered in lucious layers of dust? Of sofas, recesses spilling over with crunchy crumbs?

Is it lonely, I wonder? Does it ever want anybody to play with? So I go to it, crawling along the corridor, pushing open the door. And there it is, it's last meals layered in its transparent stomach. I pat it lovingly, and wonder at its un-monster-like name: Dyson.

The power of a new pair of shoes

After much deliberation, I finally chose my next pair of shoes: Canvas pumps with pictures of washing hanging on the line. I hope that doesn't mean I'm going to have to put the washing out from now on.

These shoes are amazing: they worked wonders for me today. I was at the park, you see, playing on the swings, and bouncy things, and I was getting impatient waiting for Mummy to give we a finger so that we could toddle to the next bit of fun, when I thought: I wonder what my new shoes can do for me. And no sooner had I wondered, than the wonder was worked, and I was wandering all by myself.

And then I was off - going from one thing to the next with no help from Mummy. I'm thinking of sacking her now, to save money!

What's going on here then?

Ever found that there are some things in life you never find the answer to? 

Raisins - RaiSINs?

All that pleasure from one tiny red box of sun-ripened goodnes. Can it be right? 

Swinging in the sun

Swinging in the sun, just swinging in the sun: what a glorious feelin'.

Or something like that. 

Thinking or Teething?

Thinking or Teething? You decide. 

Seen on a door at Aunty Joans Home

Aunty Joan lives in a big house with a lot of other friends of her age. As I was walking down the corridor, I saw this sign on a door, and asked Daddy to take a Photo. Because I have a question to ask you all.

Suppose one day, somebody decided that I was so pretty that they wanted to marry me (we're just supposing remember). Suppose also, that this person hated peas so much that I couldn't possibly say yes. Would I have to go to this room to turn them down?

Is that what it is? A room just for saying "No!"? 

On Ilkley Moor, bar t'hat.

On Monday and Tuesday we were up north, near Leeds. Our first visit was to see Aunty Charlotte, Mummy's mad friend. You can tell she's the arty type, can't you!

But we were mainly going to see my Great Great Aunty Joan (bet you don't have an Aunty Joan who is as Great as that!). We went out for dinner with her on Tuesday. As you can see from the next picture, I had to have stern words with my peas. They kept trying to jump off the plate. Wasn't my fault, of course.

After lunch we went for a walk. Since Aunty Joan is very advanced in years (I belive she is almost four-score years and ten), I thought it only right to give her a hand to keep her steady on her feet:

All in all, we had a very enjoyable Easter. Here's a few closing shots of the scenery around the Cow and Calf (on Ilkley Moor, no less).

Visiting the new baby

On Friday we went down south to visit the new baby cousin. She's very nice. I'll see if I'm allowed to show you a picture of her.

Obviously the picture I have shown you is not the baby: this is Mummy's cousin Peter. Usually, he thinks about easy things like 3 dimensional mathematical models of magentism; I got him thinking about hard problems like why Postman Pat only has three fingers. 

Happy Easter

Hello all. Sorry for not posting for a while. I've been on my travels. The good news for you is that my official photographer went with me, so I've now got plenty of new things to show you. 

Annabel Ethnic

Annabel Ethnic was one of my birthday presents. I had to cover her eyes up because Granny is a bit of a frightening sight until you get used to her. 

What a difference a year makes

The picture on the left, and those on the right were taken exactly a year apart (almost to the minute). What a difference hey?

How much have you learnt in a year? Since that first picture, top-right, I've learnt to breath, to suck, to chew; to do things at the other end which we won't talk about.

I can crawl, stand, and almost walk (seven steps the other day). I like to cuddle my dolly, to wave at people - goodbye mostly, but sometimes hello. I can do so many fascinating things with my hands - pick up things between my fingers, tear magazines to pieces.

I could go on, but it is almost bed-time. And anyway, Daddy doesn't like me to boast.

But I bet you haven't learnt as much as me! 

My Official Birthday Portrait

I know you've all been waiting for it: so here, exclusive to my website, is the official birthday portrait. 

Uncle Bob and Aunty Jean (and me)

Here's Me, my party dress, Aunty Jean, Uncle Bob, and the nice jigsaw puzzle they brought me.

Can you tell which is which and who is who?